Contrasting Realities 16

adree btethb7oony, bs I'm gonna be busy over the next week, so I wont have time to post =/

So here's an extra-long part to keep you entertained till then!

Read it slowly ;)

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Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door, interrupting…everything.

“This must be room service. I ordered breakfast”

I exhaled.

“Zain…erm…ent elbes…3shan…erm…you know…la net2a5ar. I’ll take care of…hatha…shesma…breakfast”

I walked out of the room and closed the door behind me. But I realized that I had to lean back on it for a few moments and breathe before I could move again. I tried to make another move for the door but my brain wasn’t sending any signals to move my legs. It was occupied with thousands of thoughts and images of M7ammad.

A second knock on the door finally initiated my leg movements. As I walked towards it, I started thinking of why I felt so nervous around him. It could be the way he looked, like he’d just walked out off the red carpet. It could be the way he’d caught me by surprise while I was totally unprepared for it. It could be the unbelievable amount of confidence he carried around. But that was no reason to feel this way. I hated M7ammad. M7ammad hated me. What’s wrong with me? Nothing changed – he was the slamming hottie with attitude problems.

Nothing changed... I thought to myself.

I hate M7ammad…I thought to myself.

He has attitude problems…I thought to myself.

I kept repeating those to myself until I reached the door and took our breakfast. I sat opposite the tray and reached for the blueberry jam, and proceeded to stuff myself with it like there was no tomorrow. Unlike my usual self, I was eating like a pig and I knew it. I had no intentions of slowing down, though. The sugar rush was keeping my mind off…things.

A little while later, M7ammad walked out of the door, in his olive green suit and the shirt I had just ironed. His tie was placed loosely around his neck.

“Someone’s hungry” he winked, and pointed to the dab of jam on the side of my chin.

I gave him a nervous smile, then went back to my sugar-filled jam, intentionally not wiping the jam off my face.

“Bl3afya” he said again. I looked at the huge grin he had on his face as he was watching me eat.

“Allah e3afeek” I said after I swallowed. I wiped the jam off my chin.

Now can you please leave me alone with my soothing sugary food?

“Adree athaitech Haya, bs ba6lb mennch ba3ad 6alab”

Ma 7abbait 6alabatk M7ammad!! I thought to myself.

“Erm…ee sure”

“Mo gader I tie my tie…can you do it for me please?”

“Erm…bs I don’t know how to tie a tie” I lied.

“I’ll teach you then! Yala ta3aly!”

He just never gives up, does he?

I swallowed the last spoonful of jam loudly as I looked at his piercing blue eyes and his alluring smile. As if I was hypnotized, I found myself walking towards him with slow steps.

For the second time today, our bodies were once again only inches apart. I held both ends of the tie with both of my hands.

“Now what?”

“Wa9lay the thin end of the tie layn the third button mn foug”

With my hands on his chest, I did as I was told.

“Al7en leffy hathy hnee bs mn foug…o b3dain wrap it around this side”

“Chithee?”

“Ee…you’re doing great. Al7en put this mn ta7at…wrap this around one more time”

“Okay”

"La2 la2 mo chithee" he held my hand and showed me how to wrap it, “al7en the big part, pass it through el lafa hathy eli bln9 o pull up”

I did as I was told, and pulled the tie up towards his neck.

“3ady if your top button is undone?”

“Laa please sakkry..ma gedart asakra hamm”

Here I was, staring at the nape of his neck and pretending it didn’t take all my might to keep my hands off it. I tried to close his top button, but I couldn’t because he was looking down at me.

“Zain erfa3 rask shway I can’t close it like this”

“Tamreen amr” he whispered , lifting his head only slightly.

I tried leaning in a bit and stood on my tiptoes to see but I still couldn’t. So I lightly pushed his chin up and only then could I close it. Then, I pulled his tie up. Only then did I come to the conclusion that he sprayed his M7 on the nape of his neck. I held my breath.

When I reached his neck, he was looking at me straight in the eye. I tried to focus on making his tie straight, but his stare was making me edgy. My palm that was resting on his chest and the fact that I could feel his heart beating was doing more harm than good to my mental status.

For a few moments, the world seemed to revolve around the sounds.

The sound of his heart beating.
And the sound of his lungs breathing.

When I was done with his tie, I proceeded to move away without looking at him.

“Wait“ he said, holding my arm. I turned around to find myself held in his gaze. Once again I was out of words. There was silence for what seemed like an eternity.

“Can you also fit in my tie pin and cuff-links?” he said, handing me his silver Givenchy pin and cuff-links

“Ee sure”

I tried to fit the pin with one hand only, to minimize the physical contact that was driving me crazy, but I couldn’t. Again, I put my palm against his beating heart and tried to fit it.

For another few moments, the world seemed to revolve around the sounds.

The sound of his heart beating.
And the sound of his lungs breathing.

I fitted the pin and raised his hands to fit in his cuff-links. I could see him staring at me and wearing a sly smile from the corner of my eye. As I fitted his cuff links, I also came to the conclusion that he sprayed his M7 on his wrists, which probably explained the fact that I smelled his perfume nearly everytime he moved his hands.

I walked back towards the breakfast table, finally allowing myself to breathe. He didn’t move behind me. He just stood there.

“Ma ra7 takel?”

“Laa mo yo3an…ana 6alba 7aggich entay”

“Oh okay” I said, suddenly aware of how much I’ve eaten. “Well, I’m done anyway. Emsh 5anroo7” I said.

The walk to the campus today was much better than yesterday’s. The sun was shining and the birds were singing as I walked in my comfy ballerinas. Once again, I seemed to enjoy his company, possibly a little more than I should.

During the seesions, however, I seemed to be a little more at ease with M7ammad’s closeness. The goosebumps only came once, when his foot accidentally touched my leg as he was crossing his legs under the bench. He quickly yanked it away though, apologizing thoroughly in the process.

After our sessions, we decided to go for lunch since Layla was going to be arriving in quite a few hours. We didn’t feel like eating anywhere in particular, so we decided to walk around and enjoy the beautiful weather until we decided.

As we walked past one of the numerous shops, M7ammad stopped suddenly as I walked past him. A few moments later, I realized he was still behind me. I walked back to him to see him staring at the mannequin. It was wearing a deep strapless and flowing silk purple dress with a black ribbon across the waist.

“Ee lefat nathary ana ba3ad…bs maly 5elg shopping elyom”

“My sister 3endaha 3ers oo mwa9yatny ashtereelha nafnoof ana oo radd…o I think this is as perfect as it gets”

“It is quite something”

“May5alef ndesh nshoofa?”

“Ee sure”

We walked into the store, and he asked the saleswoman to get him the dress. When she did, though, he looked at it, clearly disgusted.

“Shakla mo 7elo chithee...kan a7la 3al mannequin”

“Is this your first time shopping for dresses?”

“Evening dresses, yes”

I smiled.

“That’s why. 3ady y9eer shaklhom chithee. Ohma ma ybaynoon ‘3air 3al lebs”

He held the dress with both hands infront of him, and tilted his head to the left and right.

“Still mo 3ajebny…ra’3m enna barra kan 7elo” he said with the cutest pouty face.

I giggled.

“Zain Haya...adree 6alabaty 9ayra wayed elyom…bs ana e5ty ta8reeban the same size as you. Do you mind trying it on for me…3shan ashoofa?”

“Ee 3ady mo mshkela. I was thinking of trying it on anyway l2ana wayed 3ajabny ba3ad”

He asked the saleswoman to find my size and then, she guided me into the fitting room. On our way, we passed by the shoes section, and she picked a pair of purple velvety stilettos with strauss.

“These would look amazing with it” she said.

As I was putting on the dress, my bun was undone. My loose curls that still smelled like fruits from my shower this morning fell on my shoulders lightly. I realized it would be pointless to fix it back now, considering it would fall again when I took the dress off. I finger-combed my hair, put on the stilettos and walked out.

He was sitting on the sofa opposite the fitting room when I walked out. When his eyes fell onto me, he gasped. Literally.

After a few moments of eye-bulging and attempts at breath regulation, he was still silent. I spoke.

“Shrayek?”

“Madree shagool Haya…its…breath-taking…to say the least”

I blushed.

“Bta5tha ya3ny?”

“Honestly, I don’t think sis can pull it off the way you do”

I could now feel my red face radiating with heat. He was still gazing at me, and breathing heavily.
Was that sweat on his forehead?

“Zain shlon ya3ny?”

“E5thee entay. You’d be an idiot if you didn’t. You look...i don’t know…I just don’t even know what to say”

I laughed nervously. My stomach was doing flips.

I wonder why?

“Bs I don’t really feel like shopping today” I lied. I had left my credit card in the hotel and only had cash on me. I didn’t think we’d go shopping today with Layla arriving and all.

“Haya, hatha ma yet6awaf”

“This is one of the very few times that people try to talk me into shopping and not out of it, you know?”

He got up and walked towards me. For the third time today, our bodies were nearly touching. He raised both his arms, and slowly, they made their way past my waist, past my chest and past my shoulders. As they went up higher towards my neck and face, they stopped suddenly and went back down. He grabbed me from both my arms and turned me around to face the mirror behind me.

“Hatha…”, he emphasized, then took a deep breath “ma yet6awaf…Haya”

With his arms on my shoulder, I could see that he was gazing at me through the mirror as I gazed at myself. He seemed to be gripping me tighter and tighter by the second. I was slowly becoming uncomfortable.

Not wanting to insult him, I pulled away from his grip and walked towards the mirror, pretending to look at the dress. Even though I never looked at him, I could feel him burying holes in my back.

“I’ll think about it. We’re still here for a few more days” I said, as I headed back to the fitting room to change.

Once I entered my cubicle into the fitting room, I locked the door and stood behind it. Once again, I was trying very hard to regulate my breathing. I was trying very hard to regulate my feelings.

Despite the fact that everything he’s done today proves it, I still couldn’t believe the fact that M7ammad was interested in me. It just didn’t seem logical. I wasn’t his type. I wasn’t his style. I wasn’t his interest.

But most importantly, I wasn’t his.

I was someone else’s. I was 3abboud’s. I loved 3abboud. My 3abboudy.

Yet standing there behind that door, I came to realize that I have been in denial about my feelings for the past few days. 7amood gave me a rush that I haven’t felt in a long time; one that I don't think I’d ever felt before for that matter.

Why was I so tense around him? Why does my heart beat faster when I’m close him? Why does breathing become such an incredibly difficult task when I smell his scent?

And most importantly, why do I glow when he compliments me? I thought to myself as I looked at my glowing face in the mirror.


No no NO!!

This just isn’t possible! He can’t be interested in me!

As I took off the dress, a million conflicts were going on in my head. My brain was asking the little voice in my head to explain all the things that M7ammad has done for me so far. The little voice in my head simply said that they were coincidences, or that my brain was simply misunderstanding since it had grown to hate M7ammad for a long time and was finding it hard to believe that there could be a nice guy that lay underneath.

By the time I fixed my hair, though, they had reached a compromise. If M7ammad did one more thing today that my brain would interpret as flirting, only then would the little voice admit that he was interested.

Other than that, said the little voice in my head to my brain, you’re just looking for trouble…