Contrasting Realities 23

ehda2 5a9 7ag Gutter Flower:

no, there was no fly on her face ;Pp

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It wasn’t fair.

I never saw it coming.

I was caught off-guard.

It was unexpected and unannounced.

And uncalled for, for that matter.


In less than a split second, and in one swift move, M7ammad’s hand slid behind my neck and he closed the distance between his face and mine, not giving me a chance to react.

His lips locked with mine. It didn’t start off gently like I always presumed kisses would. He was practically devouring my lips. Like he’d been hungry for them. Like he’d been waiting for them for a long time. Like he’d been holding back for too long, and is now, finally free.

I didn’t know how to react. I didn’t know when to react. I was, yet again, frozen.

And though I never kissed him back, I never pushed him away either. I just closed my eyes and felt every senseation coming to my brain from my lips.

It started off powerful and intense, to the point where he was actually pushing my face closer to his with his hand from behind my neck. He bit on my lips and sucked on them, but never once dared tried parting my mouth or using his tongue.

Eventually though, it got softer and more passionate; less lusty perhaps. He kiss became softer and softer, and I felt the pressure of his lips on mine becoming lighter and lighter till I could only feel them on my lower lips. Then I felt the smoothest tug on my lower lips, and then…

And then they were gone.

I couldn’t open my eyes instantly. It took me a while to react. Even though I could no longer feel his lips on mine, I felt his heavy breath on them.

His face was obviously still close to mine.

And they did nothing but accentuate all the sensations that were still being transmitted from my lips. I consciously knew that his lips were no longer in contact with mine, but somehow, it didn’t sink in. I could feel electricity zooming through my body, entering every cell in it as it traveled, as if to make an announcement to each and every one of them about what had happened.

Haya Al-Flani has been kissed.

Her first kiss.

In the middle of a department store.

Not by 3bdallah, as she’d always imagined.

By someone whom she doesn’t even like.

Or does she?

How long did it last? Seconds? Minutes? Hours?

I wouldn’t have been surprised if they’d told me days. But I had lost complete track of time. And space. And….person?

Infact, I only realized that I’m losing my balance when I felt M7ammad’s hand behind my neck grip me tighter and his other one support my arm.

I finally opened my eyes.

The first thing I noticed was the red lipstick all over his lips…all over his mouth…all over his chin. Looking up I saw the dazed expression on his face, like someone just told him he was flying to the moon tomorrow. I could even see something more there. Shock? Disbelief? Guilt? Pleasure?

Then it clicked.

It was guilty pleasure.

Then I looked up. And our eyes locked.

Neither of us spoke. Neither of us could utter a word.

But somehow our eyes did all the speaking.

Looking into his deep blues now, I don’t know how I missed what I was seeing now before. I suddenly saw all the yearning, all the longing, all the holding back, all the regret, all the fake attitude, all the jealousy, all the anger, all the guilt, all the sorrow, all the lust, all the waiting, all the hoping, all the dreaming…

All the things he’d been keeping inside him for so long.

As I read it now, I realized it had always been there, but I never saw it. It was like I suddenly learnt the language of the words spoken by his eyes that I couldn’t decipher before.

It all made sense to me now.

I knew my eyes were speaking back to him, but I didn’t know the stories they were telling. And even though I had no control over what was being said, I could feel my soul pouring out.

I felt my eyes swell up and I felt the tears form inside them. The more I read into his eyes, the more I felt that my soul was being ripped apart. I didn’t know why, but I just felt worse and worse.

With my eyes still locked with his, tears started falling from them.

“Haya…” I could barely hear his voice. It was filled with so many chocking emotions.

He started reaching for my face “Haya I’m sorry…I don’t -”

The moment his fingers touched my face was the moment that it all sank in. I couldn’t stand there anymore. My emotions were taking over me. I was breaking down.

I just ran out of the store.