Contrasting Realities 13

I know I'm supposed to be away, bs here's another post! =D

I know its not too long, but its the best I could do given my hectic schedule =\

3ad halmarra 9ij I'm gonna be away for a while =\

See you in 2 weeks I guess =(

I'll miss you guys ;**

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I looked deep into my eyes in the reflection, and spoke to myself.

“No crying Haya. Ma7ad yestahal dmoo3ich. La tabcheen”

This is not going to be a good day…

“May5alef, it wont be a good day, bs hamm ma ra7 nabchy..shino entay awwal wa7da ymer 3aleha a bad day? Wla hatha your first bad day aslan?”

I knew I made sense, but I still couldn’t fight any of the tears flowing from my eyes. Every time I remembered 3abdallah’s tone of voice and his harsh words, I cried more. Every time I remembered how much I missed my 3abboudy, I cried more. Every time I looked up at my face in the mirror, and saw the pain in my eyes, I cried more.

And every time I saw myself crying more, I cried more...

After what seemed like an eternity, I somehow managed to stop crying. Even though I kept telling myself it was because I finally could gather up all my strength, I knew deep down inside that it was because I ran out of tears. Realizing that I was staring into space, I looked at my face to see that the only item of make-up that I had applied this morning, my mascara, was forming millions of blotches around my puffy eyes and irregular streams across my face.

Even when I tried to give myself an encouraging smile, I couldn’t. My skin was too stiff to move owing to the droplets, salt and mascara that lay dry on top of it.

I forced the smile through, though. Watching the scales peel off my face, I felt like I could break through this ugly day, just like I managed to break the dry film on my skin. Feeling a tiny hint of optimism, I skipped to the bathroom and washed my face with hot water, then lightly dabbed it dry. Taking out my make-up kit, I opted for adding a little more make-up around my eyes to hide my red, swollen eyes. For even more camouflage, I released my loose bun and finger-brushed my hair with my head upside down. When I put my head back up, my long brown curls fell on my grey jacket, hiding the wet black spots that had formed on it.

Something’s still missing…

I paced around the bathroom for a while, trying to recollect whatever it is that I was looking for. Then, it clicked.

I ran back to the room and opened my bag. I ran my hand through it left and right, until my palm felt the velvety texture of the cold bottle. I took it out and, unlike my usual habit, heavily sprayed the Deep Red by Hugo on my clothes, my hair, and lastly, the nape of my neck. I took a deep breath, allowing my favorite perfume to fill every last piece of my lungs.

Carefully, I placed my laptop bag on my shoulder and headed to the door. Before I walked out, though, I looked at myself in the mirror. My now lit-up face and my flowing hair, combined with the confident smile I gave myself, made me feel like I was on top of the world as I stepped out of my room.


M7ammad was sitting on the sofa, with breakfast on the table where our legs were the night before. He was nicely dressed in a navy blue suit, a baby blue shirt and a silk tie the same color as his eyes. He looked like he’s just walked off a catwalk.

I was still angry at him, and I made sure my face said it all. Without looking at him, I headed for the door of the suite.

“Haya?”

I turned around not saying anything. I was giving him the silent treatment. My eyes gave him the shtabee look, but my heart was skipping beats as I silently drooled over the CK model sitting on the sofa in my suite.

“I ordered breakfast”

“Thanks maby” I said and started turning again towards the door.

“Bs I ordered for you”

“I didn’t ask you to” I replied rudely.

He got up to his feet and walked towards me. The suit accentuated his tall, well-built physique. The colors accentuated his eyes. He was wearing another one of his smiles. He stood infront of me.

Possibly a little too close…

He took a deep breath and, if I didn’t know any better, I would’ve though he was taking in my smell.

But I knew better…


“I’m sorry about this morning. I know I was very rude, bs wallah I’m always like this when I wake up”

I continued looking into his eyes, not flinching.

“I’m not trying to justify myself and I know it’s not an excuse, bs I just wanted to apologize for my behavior”

His apology seemed sincere, but I wasn’t going to let him go that easily. He needs to realize that there are limits. Just because I asked him to stay here doesn’t mean I’m his slave now.

“Oo etha tadree ena you’re like that, why did you ask me to wake you up? Why didn’t you set your alarm? I don’t understand ya3ny, you knew you’re gonna be rude to me if I woke you up, bs you asked me to do it anyway?”

“No, its not like that. I thought I’d wake up 3la6ool; I didn’t realize I was so tired. I was afraid I’d oversleep. Oo honestly, waking up because of an alarm is very impersonal and just ruins my day. I’d rather a human being woke me up. Does that explain to you why I never show up to work early?”

I couldn’t help the smile that formed on my face.

“Zain, bs la t3eed’ha please”

“I promise I won’t" he said giving me a wide smile that displayed his flawless pearly teeth, "Now yallah, lets have breakfast 3shan yamdeena nro7 oo la net2a5ar”

He took the laptop bag off my shoulder and placed it on the floor next to the sofa. Just like last night, we sat infront of the TV, except there was butter, jam and toast instead of the burger and salad. M7ammad handed me a slice of toast and placed a coffee mug infront of me.

“Sugar?”

“Two please”


He leaned over to get the sugar from the far end of the table. I put some butter on my toast, and tried to spread it. It was too difficult to do that though; the butter and toast were too cold and, now, hard. As I squeezed the knife deeper into the toast, it started breaking in my hands and falling on my skirt and the floor. A shred of butter slowly started melting on my skirt, leaving a tiny pin-head stain on it.

This is not going to be a good day…

Realizing that there was no time for me to change into anything else, I quickly brushed the bread crumbs away from my skirt and onto the floor before more butter stains made their way through. I let out a sigh of relief when I couldn’t even tell where the tiny stain was now that the bread crumbs were gone.

Silently swearing at the stupid toast and butter that ruined my outfit, I finally looked up from the bread crumb-filled floor.

M7ammad’s outstretched hand was holding a freshly picked red rose and handing it to me.


This is not going to be a good day…